The Moment...

I'm aware that I am not a grounded person, I float about in my own little bubble with my thoughts and dreams swirling around me and nothing is more important than the moment I am in. I can't forward plan because that's not the person I am. But every so often I am brought back down to earth with a massive crash when I am reminded that life is ultimately about death and every individual life is so insignificant to the universe.

Today I was walking down the road (in my little bubble) when a hearse drove past me. Not very unusual, but as it passed I noticed that in the back next to the coffin sat an elderly man looking very solemn. I assume the deceased was his late wife. The moment really touched me. This man had accompanied his dearest to the very end of her journey. To me, that is true love.

People often obsess about what love really is. I believe that love is the essence of life and death and the only thing that survives when everything else is gone. True love follows you through life and goes with you to the grave.

Time is our biggest enemy, it ticks by so impatiently and with every passing hour our ability to change the past becomes more difficult. What I am trying to say is, make the most of the moment because life IS short and nobody wants to wake up 85 years old and wonder what might have been if...

Friedrich Nietzsche

A wise man once said, "After coming into contact with a religious man I always feel I must wash my hands."


That man was Friedrich Nietzsche, the 19th century German philosopher. Nietzsche had many idea's floating around in his oversized moustache head but unfortunately his work was widely unread until his death from mental health issues in 1900. It's thought that after his death his written word suffered some distortion by his sister and literary estate, Elisabeth and became a set of ideas which supported Hitler and Nazism... whether this is derived from his obvious hate of religion I don't know. There was always an argument surrounding whether he was a Nazi or not. Nietzsche was NOT a nazi, the nazi movement happened after he died but he was into anti-semitism but he didn't hate Jews in particular. He hated all religions equally. "God is dead." was a famous quote of his


Through out his 1885 philisophical novel, 'Thus Spoke Zarathustra', Nietzsche talks about the overman which is essentially the superman theory. He believed that humanity was something that must be overcome and that the world consisted of Übermensch people such as Leonardo Davinci, Beethoven and Shakespeare. He said that 'normal' people could become superpeople by breaking away from conventions. It could be argued that Nietzsche was a role model for gay rights as he believed you don't need to worry that being gay is wrong because that is a collectivist idea, just as all religions are too.

WINOL 10/02/10

Today's broadcast... what an absolute shambles. Nobody is to blame, which is why I am so flared up by overhearing people take the first opportunity to shirk the blame onto the next mug. It's our FIRST live broadcast with this reduced group so nobody was expecting any miracles. The problem was that nobody really knew what was expected of them. Roles were not explained in full to the people who really needed to know.

I'd like to take this opportunity to apologise for my role in the downfall of WINOL! I was told I was the script writer and so I was shown a sort of template of how to do it and just did as I was told... bad idea. I should have shunned the help and taken full responsibility for the role. A little research would have gone a long way today. Next week will be very different as I plan to take a more active role, and less bullshit. My role was not explained to me properly and so I was running around running errands totally irrelevant to my role. I think there was an "at the moment" attitude through-out the newsroom when everyone should have been looking at the bigger picture.

I'm not making excuses but my production group had held a meeting without me and so I received the 'left over' job that nobody wanted, that happened to be a vital one! If I had been there I would not have opted for this role but now I have it I will endeavor to improve and excel. To be fair I didn't want to be a news reporter last semester but once I got my head around it I was alright so I am trying to see the positives in that this is all relevant experience.

I noticed that in the news room, as predicted, nobody was willing to take a role of authority which made for a more laid back approach which really, REALLY did not do the bulletin any justice. I hope that people will stop worrying about what others think and do/say what needs to be to get the job done.

Rant over... now I'm off to slit my wrists!

Back To The Grindstone, That Is Winol...

Yesterday saw the beginning of the second semester for me and my Journo chums and as we all try and tackle our brand new roles it's the early mornings that seem to be the killer. I, myself entered the newsroom yesterday morning bright eyed and bushy tailed... probably something to do with the 9pm bedtime the night before!! Best sleep, EVER! Second morning back, I'm not going to lie... getting out of bed was a struggle! The smell of tea and coffee is wafting through the air as people try and shock themselves awake with copious amounts of caffeine.

SO! This semester I have moved from the newsteam onto the production team and it's a good place to be. Chanin, the production editor has assigned me to write the scripts for the Wednesday bulletin. This means I am trying to get my head around a new programme, ENPS. I am a bit worried that if I word something the wrong way, the VJ's who worked on the story might be disappointed with me but I am going to do my best to do everyone justice... although the temptation to fill the autocue with absolute gobble-de-gook to see the presenter, my friend, Glenn Hutt panic is SO great! I wouldn't though!

Tom Otrebski has taken over from James Kenyon as News Editor and is doing a mighty fine job so far! He has a harder job than James had in my opinion as James did not know us. He was a year above, he had not made friendships and bonds with us but Tom is a friend to many of us so I think he will struggle in being authoritive initially. I know I would! But Tom has made a vow to make the news outweigh the sports section of the bulletin and I believe we can achive this goal this semester.

Being the first live bulletin of the semester tomorrow I think emotions will be running high as everybody tries to get the show on the road. It seems that there is a bit of a lack of news this week as some people were unclear whether we would run a bulletin but hopefully it will be a success.

Tune in at 5pm tomorrow to find out how we did...

www.winol.co.uk

Something HAS to change...

Today I travelled to London for an audition to be a contestant on a gameshow. Now entering for this was so out of character as it was. I am not what I would call an 'extrovert' and I'm definitely not one to 'put myself out there' but I had come across this website called beonscreen.com and they were scouting for contestants with "brain and brawn" and although I possess neither of these traits I suddenly decided to go for it. I sent my application off and a few days later had a call inviting me to come and audition... so today at 3pm there I was.

The audition was a collection of activities to bring out our personalities and test our fitness... yes there was a bleep test and no I do NOT want to talk about it :/

So we got round to doing some screen tests and that was when it hit me. I. am. BORING. Among my fellow auditionees were; a stand up comedian, a scuba diver, a man who had recently lost 6 stone in weight, a girl who could raise her leg above her head... and then me. It got to my screen test which went a bit like this....

"Hi, I'm Kayleigh, I'm nearly 21 and I study Journalism in Winchester." (voice of God: What's going on in Winchester Kayleigh?) "Nothing... absolutely nothing happens in Winchester". (What do you do in your spare time) "My degree takes up alot of my time but apart from that I like going out drinking."

I have absolutely NOTHING interesting to say about me! At what point in my life did I decide I wasn't going to do anything for myself... I was just going to become engulfed in stuff going on around me? I can't live like this anymore! What an actual granny I am! I'm making changes starting today. I've bought a brand new diary and I have told myself that there has to be something in it that's new and exciting on a minimum of a monthly basis, so if you're a member/organiser of a tap dancing class, opera rehearsal, base jumping team, or ANYTHING else, keep an eye out because I might just be joining you soon!

Love and hugs :)